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Posts Tagged ‘Handsome Furs’

It’s March 9, 2011 and I’m currently unemployed, and finally getting around to listening to a lot of the crappy albums that I didn’t even know had been taking up space on my external drive for the past several years. This is the first in a weekly series of brief and candid thoughts about them.

Al Di Meola – Casino (1978) – sounds like the type of music really rich mexican drug kingpins play on their bose stereo systems while they’re having sex with prostitutes that they pay extra not to talk.

Belle & Sebastian – Belle & Sebastian Write About Love (2010) – reminds me of the feeling you get when you’re enjoying the perfect summer day in the park and then you try to use the park bathroom and all the seats are covered in feces, but one has slightly less feces than the others so you use that one.

Deerhunter – Weird Era Cont (2008) – this sounds like the perfect soundtrack for a movie about a high school valedictorian who gets addicted to cough syrup in college, drops out, and then, instead of getting professional help, goes on a cross-country road trip across europe on an epic quest of self-discovery and more cough syrup. Which is why I can’t relate to this album: I’m not very bright, I never do drugs, and I hate to travel.

Handsome Furs – Plague Park (2007) – All these songs sound like “Dancing in the Dark” slowed down to half-speed. Actually this is probably what Born in the U.S.A. would have been if Springsteen had been born 3 months premature on an ashram and grew up with lots of food allergies and then ran away from home in 1997 because he was so devastated by how bad the Spawn movie was.

Tapes nā€™ Tapes ā€“ Outside (2011) ā€“ This is the kind of album people who have forgotten about 9/11 make for other people who have forgotten about 9/11.

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